Don't Ever Tell Me To Stop Picking My Nose Again!

Next time you tell a kid to stop picking their nose, just remember that this could happen to them. I tell every kid I see to dig for gold on the regular, or they might lose part of their brain....straight through the nostril!

Drunk Man Arrested: Sings Entire Bohemian Rhapsody

Clearly he wasn't THAT drunk if he could sing the entire song. I've done countless drunken renditions of this song, and NONE of them sounded this good.

Also, I know it's Canada and they have a higher standard of education than moronic USA, but he is the absolute most eloquently spoken drunkard I've ever heard.

Nightclubbing Like a Son of a Bitch

There was no stopping this dude. Never mind the fact that he was the only one in the club that wasn't personally invited by Polo, the birthday boy. Never mind the fact that he was 20+ years older than everyone in the joint.

Ball so hard his tie don't even need a collar!

Major Lazer Going Ape Shit

Ever since I saw Major Lazer's music video for their smash hit Pon De Floor, they've been a guilty pleasure of mine. And by guilty pleasure I mean the music isn't anything spectacular, it's bad dance music that 19 year olds obsess over. Regardless, these dudes are pretty cool.

They're new single "Original Don" (which actually sounds like 7 single snippets rolled into one) is all over the place, msahing genres and BPMs. I'm anxiously awaiting the music video for this.

Blackout Wedding

Best part about going to/being in a wedding at a hotel? Not having to worry about getting home. Queue in: The Blackout Wedding. I had the amazing privilege of being part of Chris Ngo, one of my long time best friends, and his beautiful wife Sophia Ngo's wedding this past weekend.

520 people. Enough said.

Reality Hits You Hard, Bro!

Boom!

I didn't know Chris Farley had a second brother, glad to see he's doing ok though.

"All of a sudden I was minding my own business"....Uhhh, what were you doing before that then; if it was only all of a sudden that you began to mind your own business?

Suspicious Behavior

Some car blew up for whatever reason in Los Angeles earlier this week. Coincidentally, someone got it all on camera. And again coincidentally, that camera man had a lighter on his balcony ledge. And once more coincidentally, the camera man with a lighter on his balcony ledge also lived directly in front of the exploding car. Hmm, if the LAPD doesn't have a suspect yet I'd like to collect a reward for helping them solve this case.

Oh, and also a phenomenal example of badassery, the firefighter battling the flames isn't phased by the explosion one iota.

The Antics Roadshow, A Banksy Production

48 minute program highlighting some of the best social pranks in recent history, produced by Banksy for BBC IV.

Enjoy, I know you wont watch but it's here for you anyways.

And remember, never stick anything in the head of the penis, not even boogies.

Beavis and Butthead 2011

As usual this time of year, Comic Con has given us previews for the awesomeness that will ensue the remainder of the year. This time around, Mike Judge previewed Beavis and Butthead 2011. That's right, NEW episodes of Beavis and Butthead!

Fear the Beard

THIS is what sports should be like. Enough of the seriousness, Lebron James hating, and football players committing murder (or every other crime in the book). These players get paid millions of dollars to PLAY a game, a game they supposedly love. So why aren't more players enjoying their free time the way Shaq, Dirk, and Brian Wilson do.

One day after pitching a save in the MLB All-Star game, Brian Wilson donned a spandex tuxedo at the ESPN Espy Awards show.

Time to order my "Fear the Beard" shirt.

Critical Mass....Murder

Not that I condone this kind of violence but I drive in some of America's worst traffic (LA is notorious for its traffic jams) 4 to 5 times a week and I'll be the first to admit, I've had the urge to do this at least 2 or 3 THOUSAND times.



I know the video is old. Relax, no one died. Sorry, bikes don't count as lives.

Super Mario Brothers Was Hard

So you thought Super Mario Brothers was easy? Then why did blow the bottom of the cartridge when the game didn't load properly? Yeah, look at this guy. Don't worry, I don't expect you to watch the entire thing, but you get the idea. His audio accompaniment is pretty damn hilarious too.

15:30 "Hoh Ho! Freebie! Got through on a technicality. De-Fautl!"

Bushman Was the Man

No! Bushman IS the man.

Ring up another alter ego for Kool Keith.

Maxi curls, yeeeeahhh! Players activator.
Maxi curls, yeeeeahhh! Remote control alligators.

I Want This

Not the car, the driving skills.

Kids With Uzis

My friend Matt Andrews showed my other friend Joe Navran who in turn showed Ken Do, Tuilagi Soifua and me. Yes, that breaks down to one Black guy, one Persian guy, one Asian guy, one Somoan guy and one half Mexican/half White guy. The true epitome of "going viral". No continent was untouched.

Unsuspecting Drunks Put On Blast

Sarah is out of town this weekend and I'm bored surfing the net. Haven't been to textsfromlastnight.com in awhile and I completely forgot how hysterically amusing it is.

Here's a quick sample of the funnier ones I read today:

Fight For Your Right - Revisited

Will Farrell, Jack Black, John C. Reilly, Seth Rogan, Elijah Wood, Danny McBride, Will Arnett, Jason Schwartzman, Rainn Wilson, Ted Danson, Susan Sarandan, Shannyn Sossamon, Steve Buscemi, Amy Poehler, Alicia Silverstone, Chloe Sevigny, Kirsten Dunst, Maya Rudolph, David Cross and Orlando Bloom.

Yup, that's the cast for this 30 minute re-visitation of The Beastie Boys' classic "Fight For Your Right To Party". Yes, you read correctly, THIRTY MINUTES. All that talent jam packed into 30 minutes of film magic.

Cowbell at 1:44

Kevin's a Girl!???

Real life "Up" house.

Explosive Art

Alexandre Farto takes bombing seriously, literally. Strategically placed explosives create his masterpieces.

Dope background track too.

I Know What She'll Be For Halloween

This is Supatra Sasupha (try saying that 5 times, fast), she has a seriously messed up chromosome somewhere in her DNA that left her with a really rare disease called Ambras Syndrome. The disease causes the carrier to grow really thick hair everywhere.

On the bright side, while money is wasted on razors and scissors all year long, even more money is saved on Halloween costumes. I REALLY hope she's a Star Wars fan, cause she's a dead ringer for Chewbacca.

Ironically, or not, this was the 666th post on our blog. It's a sign, hairy werewolf girls are going to take over